When did the female body become a disgrace

Let’s be honest about bodies. We all have them. They’re all we have. And let’s talk about the female body. What a beautiful beautiful place to hold all our memories, tragedies, hopes, dreams, love, and everything else we hold in our minds.

As a female, as a model, as a sister, as a daughter, I have come across numerous attempts at unsolicited grabs, remarks, and other forms of toxic masculinity. I’ll be totally honest, I hate this term. Makes me feel small. And I know there is an entire culture around this, but I do not believe in men treating women with disregard, regardless of their beliefs.

I posted a picture on my Instagram (Instagram: @gelitv) and I have to say, I am the founder of this company. Since it’s inception I have battled with the idea that I need to constantly close myself off to find true love in this world. That my body is not enough. That my views are too much. That I should be ashamed of the way I look. I have fought, I have cried, I have lied, I have covered, and I have died. 

Over and over I have been ridiculed by people due to the way God made me. And I have to say, I clearly do not give a fuck anymore. I wouldn’t change my body. I wouldn’t change a damn thing. I am proud of the way I look, I am proud of how hard I work to keep fit and in shape and I am not ashamed to show it off in public, in private, or where I feel necessarily.

Last week while traveling, I had multiple men approach me and try to grab me. I had a man yell at me “Come here” and I firmly said “no” he yelled again, “COME HERE” which I again replied “NO” and he did it again. I said “NO!” You cannot tell me what to do! You are not in charge of me or have any authority over me. And keep in mind this is during the BLM movement to which you would think people would be a little more kind.

Instead he proceeded to grab himself and show me his intentions - as to which I have to give the guy credit. I guess in one way of thinking he thought if I was interested.  But to be totally open and honest, any man looking to get a woman should show respect. Regardless of how she chooses to show her body. And the funny part is, I was thinking of white privilege the other day.

The men that have always come up to me and physically grabbed me have been black. This particular man was black. Have I been catcalled by white men? Yes. Have I had a white man assault me? Yes. Have most black men treated me with respect? Yes. The point I’m trying to make is that my body belongs to me. My views on how I choose to represent, respect, and show my body to the world belongs to me.

I don’t look at other women and think “you slut” I look at other women and try to appreciate the curves of their body. The cute stretch marks they have. The dimples on their thighs. Their cheeks. The way they smile. The way they laugh. They mean something to me. Women are objectified because men predominantly and inherently have a primal nature and their kind defaults to sex. And when they cannot have that from you, you are called a whore. Same for some women who cannot respect or appreciate another female.

I don’t get upset when men comment or dm about my body anymore, because I understand that when I appreciate my body : my views change. I can take what they say as a woman and say fuck you, or I can say thank you for appreciating my body. Men should appreciate us. Hell, we should appreciate us. We should appreciate each other.

All the curves and edges. And shite, my mama didn’t push me outta her womb for me to be ashamed of myself or ashamed of my experiences or ashamed of what I’ve been through. I’m not ashamed of being assaulted, I understand as a female figure it is my duty and my right to be PROUD OF WHO I AM.

I’ll never let another man touch me again (without my consent 😉) but that’s the point. Consent. Constant consent men. It is YOUR job to make the women around you feel comfortable and to learn more about why women feel this way. Women get abused every single fucking day, and I’m not saying men don’t either. I especially know in the gay and trans community this is a big deal. But as a species, as a culture, as AMERICANS. Treat the women in your life how you would want to treat the women in your family (the ones you like lol) but for real!

With kindness, respect, understanding, compassion. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, judge yourself and you judge others. Just be yourself. The world needs more of it. Booties, boobies, and all ✊🏻✊🏾✊