I'm not a human, I'm a cyborg.

I'm not a human, I'm a cyborg.

Hear me out, I know I say this for clout.

I'm not a human, I'm a cyborg. Because why would I want to divorce.

A divorce from you, a divorce from me, a divorce from everything.

It's like a millet shaped pumpernickel rye, sitting on top of a guy, who you can't look in the eye. So yes, I want a divorce. A discovery phase of minutes, milestones, and experiences to see what's in it for me and you and us and the two people behind us. Who do they know? Well, you two. It's a blue eyed bundle of joy, walking into the room with you. Who knew? They knew. As long as I'm with you, my sentiments will be based on two truths. You, and the boy in blue. Taking back the games we played, the pre-programmed coding in the airwaves and walking our own way. We plan to pay the world off in deals and wheels and sunny new heels. It's a poem mainly but wouldn't it be insane if we could come here with kindness and leave this planet with kindness. Instead my brain finds all the ways to complain. And in this day and age, I would be a cyborg. Unable to think for myself, to clearly define a goal and execute it or to stick up for myself or create a new vision. I could be a cyborg, programmed one way or another, so why do I feel like my millions of plans and ideas are on a swiggly shelf without you and my mental health - I have been alone for sometime now, romantically that is, and can see that no one is really meant to be alone. We become when we have others to bounce ideas off of (safe places and people) some people are more resilient and accepting of being in large groups of people safely sharing, I am now becoming one of those, but coming from someone who stood in front of 100's of people to teach classes on sales and marketing, which became 10's of 1000's of people in my early twenties, I find it fascinating now that I have a hard time in large groups of people. I tend to blackout from the emotions I feel unless I feel protected either by my significant other and have a grounding mechanism or security around me. So it hasn't been an easy feat to be around large groups in public or private places, but it's a response from terrible events that have occurred and I have to be patient with myself. As I grow, transition, heal and become healthy. My brain is a wild chick inside and living in the outside world as her can be a monster of a problem if I don't feel like I'm taken care of. I will rebel and make moves that are huge. And being that girl has the whirlwind of emo in my house, stretching and sketching and sweating with male testosterone to get these ideas out of my home and into your own. Thank you for hearing me on this one. I am a cyborg. I will never be ignored.  

 


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